Can someone really define us?

I have to admit that I am always been interested in many different topics, areas of interest and issues. But at the end of the day, non of them were linked or connected, or 'on the same line'. None of them were consistent with each other.

That's probably why, my favourite subjects were English Literature, Philosophy, Physics, Maths, History and Art. I kept struggling in finding a main interest, something to feel passionate about.

Anything. No ideas. No new feelings. Emptiness.

This is the story. That's it.

Even trying to find something to study at Uni has been really hard. My reaction is still "Oh, interesting", to many things I have to study or to read. Full stop.

Yesterday night, as night bird as I am, I have decided to try few psychological tests as a quest for help. "Maybe I could easily understand something more about myself", I thought.

After many attempts, I found the Jung's conceptions about the psychological types.

After I completed a test, a kind of 240 questions which took more or less 40 minutes, I have received a complete analysis of my habits, emotions, way of thinking. And it was not that wrong, actually. 

I kept thinking about it all day, trying to use those things I read to find justifications for past failures, and situations and, above all trying to interpret myself according to definitions written by strangers.

It is really possible that a test can identify you so perfectly? I have always thought that human beings were so complex that all their infinite facets were impossible to be found, or interpret. You can come closer to it, but...is it true? I am in this way or in that way and there is no possibility for me to change? Fifty shades of human beings. That would have been a great best seller.

Of course, they warn you, " This is not to be taken for granted. Some people prefer doing things, activities which are completely incompatible within the way they are and they are successful".

But I keep thinking about the fact that, if I stick to those ideas, to those things I read because that's probably the way I am, where is improvement?Where is evolution? Does it mean that If I am shy and introvert, would be so hard for me to change and being in the spotlight?

I read about all the possible careers connected to my psychological profile which are perfect to me, nothing to say about it, but...should I follow the advice?

That's the point. Should I let a test, a definition, to define me as I am someone or something for which 'changes' are basically impossible?

Or maybe, I should take all the risks I can and see how those new things lead me.

Well, no one can give you the answer to all those main questions that occupy your mind. And no one, can actually tell you which is the way which most likely will bring you to success.

I firmly believe in the existence of our "own path" and each step is a step forward to what it is meant to be. Maybe those tests were a part of it.

So, come on, follow your way, make your choices, fail, fall and for God's sake, go on!

Happy Wednesday to everybody!

-C.L